When you reach the peak of Mount Dew, it’s a breathtaking sight. The soda franchise has had numbers missteps to be sure, but its successes are legion: Livewire, Pitch Black, Voltage, Baja Blast, and of course the original classic flavor are all sodas to be envied. The slopes are narrow, however, and it’s easy to fall off to a pointy demise like the foul line of Mountain Dew Kickstarts, or bounce off with a glancing injury like the mediocre Code Red or Citrus-Cherry Game Fuel. An injury like that is really hard to get medical treatment for, since you’re stranded on a mountain.
That metaphor really got away from me.
The point is, as much as I enjoy a good Mountain Dew, and look forward to new flavors, they’re not always great. It was with some trepidation that I picked up a glass twelve-ounce bottle of Mtn Dew Dewshine- a bottle that proudly declares it to be “non-alcoholic.” This communicates right off the bat what a confused product it is- they’re so worried you’ll think it’s a wine cooler that they have to clarify its lack of alcohol. Its flavor? “Clear citrus.” Well, since regular Mountain Dew is called citrus soda, does that make it simply a colorless, transparent Mountain Dew? No, it’s a totally new flavor. What flavor, exactly? …Citrus.
It’s a lemon soda, basically: like lemon-lime soda with no lime. It doesn’t taste like a carbonated lemonade- the lemon taste is not nearly that strong. It’s sweet and limp, and if you let it get warm it tastes like straight garbage. I’ll be blunt- this is not a good soda. The bottle is fun, the name is fun, but then you have to drink it. If you drink it quite fast, while it’s still very cold, it is inoffensive at best. If you let it sit around at all it becomes unpleasant to put inside your body.
Dewshine is made with real sugar, and generally I’m a big fan of that… but part of what gives Mountain Dew its unique taste is the corn syrup. Mountain Dew Throwback is actually not as tasty as regular Mountain Dew, because it’s already such a chemical combination of nightmare fuel that throwing an authentic, natural ingredient in just upsets the balance of the drink. I’ve obviously never had Dewshine with corn syrup, because it doesn’t exist, but it doesn’t taste like a Mountain Dew product. It tastes like a generic Sprite or 7up- not quite as good as the real deal. There are notes of caffeine like every Mountain Dew drink, and I like them, but they just feel out of place in such a light, personality-less soda.
If you wanna spend a buck or two on a bottle of Dewshine simply for the novelty, because it’s a cool looking bottle and you wanna try the new Dew, it’s not going to be an awful experience for you. But please, please do not buy more than one… and don’t expect to enjoy it. It’s really just a lame soda, and a big disappointment.
THE RATING: NOPE.